The suitcases are packed. The car seat is installed. The pack and play is folded in the trunk.
And you're already bracing yourself.
Not just for the travel. For the comments.
"Just let her stay up, it's a holiday!"
"In my day we didn't have all these rules."
"Give him to me, I'll rock him to sleep."
If you're staying with grandparents or extended family this holiday season, you might feel stuck between protecting your child's sleep and keeping the peace.
Growing up in an Indian family, I know this one deeply. Here's how to do both.
Why Do Babies Sleep Worse at the Grandparents' House?
New places are exciting and overwhelming for little ones. There are new sounds, new smells, new faces, more noise, later dinners and lots of extra stimulation.
Add in travel, a different sleep space and a disrupted schedule, and it's no wonder sleep gets bumpy.
That doesn't mean you should stay home. It means a little planning goes a long way. (For more travel tips, here are 5 things to help your baby sleep while traveling.)
Before You Go: Set Yourself Up for Success
Decide on Your Non-Negotiables
You can't control everything, so choose one or two things that matter most. For many families, that's a consistent bedtime and at least one solid nap a day. Let the rest be flexible.
Share Your Plan Ahead of Time
A quick, warm heads-up before you arrive prevents a lot of tension. Try something like: "We're so excited to see you! Just so you know, we'll be putting the baby down around 7 so she's happy for all the fun the next day."
Ask About the Sleep Space
Where will your baby sleep? Will you be sharing a room with them? Is there a room that can be made dark? Is there space for a pack and play? Knowing ahead of time helps you pack the right things.
What to Pack for Sleep Away From Home
Pack and play or travel crib (or confirm one is there)
A fitted sheet from home (it smells familiar)
Sleep sack
Portable white noise machine
Blackout material (portable blinds, or painter's tape and dark trash bags)
Lovey, if your child is over 12 months
Extra pacifiers, if your child uses them
Want the full list? Here's my ultimate baby travel checklist.
How to Protect Sleep While You're There
Recreate Home as Much as Possible
Set up the sleep space the same way as at home. Dark room, white noise on, same sleep sack, same routine.
Keep Your Routine, Even If It's Shorter
Same steps, same order, same song or phrase. Your routine is the most portable sleep tool you have. Research led by pediatric sleep researcher Dr. Jodi Mindell found that a consistent nightly bedtime routine helped babies and toddlers fall asleep faster and wake less often during the night (Mindell et al., Sleep, 2009).
Give Family a Job in the Routine
This is my favorite tip. Grandparents usually just want to be close to their grandbaby. Let Grandma give the bath, or let Grandpa read the bedtime book. They feel included, and you keep the routine intact.
Protect at Least One Nap
If naps on the go are hard, try to make sure one nap happens in the dark, quiet sleep space each day. Others can be in the car or stroller.
Keep Sleep Safe in a New Space
Guest rooms and grandparents' homes don't always have a safe sleep setup ready. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that babies sleep on their back, on a firm, flat surface like a crib, bassinet or pack and play, with no pillows, blankets or bumpers, and in the same room as a parent but not in the same bed (AAP, Pediatrics, 2022). Older cribs and well-meaning extras like a cozy quilt are worth a quick check before the first nap.
Be Flexible When It Matters
If there's a big family dinner or a special moment, let bedtime be late. Just get back on track the next day with an earlier bedtime. Here's exactly how to get sleep back on track after a late night.
How to Handle Grandparents' Sleep Comments Kindly
Grandparents' advice almost always comes from love. Here are a few phrases that keep things warm.
"Thank you, I know you did it differently. This is just what's working for us right now."
"I know, I know! But a well-rested baby is a much happier baby to cuddle tomorrow."
"Would you like to do bath time with her tonight?"
"Our pediatrician recommended this, so we're sticking with it."
You don't need to win the conversation. You just need to calmly do what's right for your child.
What If Sleep Falls Apart Anyway?
Sometimes it will. And that's okay.
A few rough nights while traveling won't undo your child's sleep. When you get home, go back to your normal routine, keep wake windows age-appropriate and offer an earlier bedtime for a few nights. Most kids are back on track within a few days. (Not sure what's right for your baby's age? Here's my guide to awake windows for better baby sleep.)
Your Holiday Sleep FAQs
Should my baby sleep in my room while visiting family?
Room-sharing while traveling is often the easiest option. Use a pack and play or travel crib (never a shared adult bed), and use white noise and a small dim light for nighttime care. The Sleep Foundation's guide to co-sleeping explains the difference between room-sharing and bed-sharing.
How do I get my baby to sleep in a new place?
Recreate home: dark room, white noise, the same sleep sack and the same bedtime routine. Familiar cues help your baby feel safe in a new space.
How do I tell grandparents about my baby's sleep schedule without offending them?
Share the plan warmly before you arrive, focus on how good sleep helps your child enjoy the visit, and invite them into the routine with a special job like bath time or the bedtime book.
How long does it take to get back on track after holiday travel?
Usually two to five days once you're home and back to your normal routine.
Is it okay if my baby naps in the car or stroller while we're visiting?
Yes. On busy holiday days, a nap on the go is better than no nap. Try to protect one nap in the dark sleep space each day, and let the others happen wherever they fit.
Make the Memories
The holidays are about family, and your child being in the arms of the people who love them most is a gift.
Protect what matters. Let go of the rest. And enjoy every moment of watching your parents become grandparents.
Holiday Sleep at the Grandparents' House: Quick Recap
Pick one or two sleep non-negotiables, like bedtime and one solid nap, and let the rest be flexible.
Share your plan warmly before you arrive and ask about the sleep space.
Pack a familiar sheet, sleep sack, white noise and blackout material.
Recreate home and keep your bedtime routine, even if it's shorter.
Give grandparents a special job in the routine, like bath time or the bedtime book.
Keep sleep safe: baby on their back, on a firm, flat surface, with nothing else in the crib.
Most kids are back on track within a few days of getting home.
Research and Resources
Keep Reading
Grab a Free Sample Sleep Schedule
Age-by-age nap and bedtime schedules you can start using tonight.
Get your free sample sleep schedule here
Want a Plan Made Just for Your Family?
If you're tired of guessing, my 1:1 VIP Sleep Coaching gives you a personalized, gentle sleep plan and daily support from me until your nights feel calm again. No cry-it-out.
Book your VIP Sleep Coaching here
Unnati Patel is a certified pediatric sleep consultant, published epidemiologist (MPH), and founder of Nested to Rested Sleep. She has helped thousands of families worldwide achieve better sleep using a gentle, evidence-based, family-centered approach, no cry-it-out required. She lives in Atlanta, GA with her husband (a child psychiatrist) and their two children.